Well I've noticed that its been almost a month since I last updated. Time flies, right? I feel like its sort of NOT POSSIBLE that I've been a McNeil employee for 2 months already. I mean really? Can that happen? I'm 1/3 done, and I feel like its still my first week. Although I guess in the scheme of things (especially when the future looks like 9-5 everyday, not just for 6months at a time) its good news! If two months feel like a week, then a year will feel like a 1.5 months. Granted it doesn't leave me much time to stop and smell the roses, but does anyone have much time for that anymore?
In short, life has been busy. I've been doing my best to keep up with everything- the two jobs, friendships, family, boyfriend. I can't believe how hard it is. One thing on my wish list- the ability to focus 90% of my energy into one thing. But I guess it is fun getting e-mails at work from my residents telling me there is puke in the washing machine...
5.22.2008
4.29.2008
When life gets going...
...sometimes you just get too busy to post your life in a blog.
It's good, crazy, busy, hectic, sometimes I get so frustrated I feel like breaking down, but I keep going. Thank goodness for drive. (and I'm definitely in 5th gear).
It's good, crazy, busy, hectic, sometimes I get so frustrated I feel like breaking down, but I keep going. Thank goodness for drive. (and I'm definitely in 5th gear).
4.14.2008
Two full time jobs. Or being a working mother
So I think I finally understand (well, kind of!) what its like to have two full time jobs or be a working mother, aka CRAZY. Last night I was up with one of my residents til the wee hours of the morning, to wake up 4 hours later. If anyone knows me, they understand that I need a good 8 to be enjoyable and functionable . But the funny part about it all was that I didn't mind. I loved the fact that I was there when she needed me, helped her through a very unfortunate situation, and get her back on her way to feeling comfortable. I'm sure plenty of RA's have horror stories of endless nights (kids don't like to throw up/need to be transported to the hospital til about 4am, drug busts take 2 hours.. you get the idea..) but I love mine because its a horror story- especially since I missed out on eating my Ben&Jerrys and watching Law&Order- but then it was a triumph. Oh the joys of living a double life.
4.10.2008
Negative Nancy
So I am occasionally guilty of ranting on about something that really pissed me off. But why does everyone have to fill their blogs with not so good news? I guess I get the fact that its a great place to put it all out onto "paper", but what are the expectations of return for doing that? Condolences from other bloggers? A sense of relief, of getting it off your chest? Is blogging turning into an escape from the problems themselves instead of actually solving them?
Today for work (at the glorious McNeil Consumer Healthcare , a subsidiary of Johnson and Johnson) many magical things happened. I mean sure getting up at 5:30 was painful after being on duty BUT it was SO worth it! I went to Consumer Day, something where J&J consumer branches meet up in New Jersey and attend sessions on innovative market researchers within our category. A couple of them were about understanding "mom", how America shops, blogging (I know! and I was one of the few who knew what Twitter was!) , the archeology of the female purse (very interesting!) and were told to take notes on post-its. So I grabbed my retractable sharpie- cool office supplies a plus- and jotted away. Listening to the blogging presentation I really wondered about what bloggers do, who they are, what their place, purpose, rational happens to be. And then I learned about a woman who lost her husband this past December, and maintained her blog throughout the entire thing. He was only 50, and they have two kids (age 22 and 17). Now that is a tragedy. Is that person who took too long ordering at Starbucks who then made you late for work really worth ranting about? I think we are guilty of all taking the lower road instead of the high one. Why not help out the person ahead and suggest a drink to them? Instead of getting angry for no one else doing something, be proud of yourself for being that person who did. I guess I may be overly optimistic, beyond being realistic, or maybe I'm just lucky. But I don't know when my life is going to end, so I'm going to go right ahead and enjoy right now.
Today for work (at the glorious McNeil Consumer Healthcare , a subsidiary of Johnson and Johnson) many magical things happened. I mean sure getting up at 5:30 was painful after being on duty BUT it was SO worth it! I went to Consumer Day, something where J&J consumer branches meet up in New Jersey and attend sessions on innovative market researchers within our category. A couple of them were about understanding "mom", how America shops, blogging (I know! and I was one of the few who knew what Twitter was!) , the archeology of the female purse (very interesting!) and were told to take notes on post-its. So I grabbed my retractable sharpie- cool office supplies a plus- and jotted away. Listening to the blogging presentation I really wondered about what bloggers do, who they are, what their place, purpose, rational happens to be. And then I learned about a woman who lost her husband this past December, and maintained her blog throughout the entire thing. He was only 50, and they have two kids (age 22 and 17). Now that is a tragedy. Is that person who took too long ordering at Starbucks who then made you late for work really worth ranting about? I think we are guilty of all taking the lower road instead of the high one. Why not help out the person ahead and suggest a drink to them? Instead of getting angry for no one else doing something, be proud of yourself for being that person who did. I guess I may be overly optimistic, beyond being realistic, or maybe I'm just lucky. But I don't know when my life is going to end, so I'm going to go right ahead and enjoy right now.
4.08.2008
Oh and forgive me
Also, for those of you who threw up on the one year post, my sincerest apologies. I threw up also. Sweet potato fries don't come up well.
Hello, My Name is Fred.
So I found myself purchasing the March 31st issue of Fortune Magazine. What happens when you read on the train? You become consumed by amazing stories, like the one I am about to post.
"This is a story of a guy named Fred who dared to see himself as something bigger. And because he did - because he was able to take that leap of faith - he made a good thing happen. Those who dare to imagine sometimes get what they want. Those who don't never do.
We had been interviewing people for a mid-level management job for, say, five months. If that seems odd to you, then you haven't run a department where every position represents the cumulative function of six that existed before. Choose the wrong person, and you enter a zone of dysfunction not all that different from having a debilitating disease. Ever have the flu but still have to go to the office? A bad hire is like that.
You see a lot of talented people when you're in this process, but within six seconds - not seven or eight- you know whether the person in front of you is going to be somebody with whom you can sustain a ten-minute conversation. The only thing I look for is whether the prospect of doing so makes me feel like falling asleep. I am not being metaphorical. Since I was a child, whenever I feel anxious and trapped, my eyelids get heavy. You can see how much I like the whole enterprise, then. And yet it must be done.
One day, deep in the darkest part of this tedium, Fred knocked at my door. Fred has worked for us for a long time, as long as I've been here, in fact. He's a good guy and a reliable, creative player. Never saw him as a manager, though. There are many like that, actually. Put them on a horse in the middle of the phalanx and they fight with gusto and brilliance. Put that horse at the front of the column and they lead the squad by a circuitous route into the swamp.
Fred stood in my doorway and said, "You found anybody for that manager slot yet?" And I thought, "Oh, no." I like Fred. I don't want to hurt Fred's feelings. "May I come in?" said Fred.
"Sure, Fred," I said.
"I've been thinking a lot about this job you're trying to fill, and I think I could be pretty good at it," said Fred. He had a file on his lap, and he opened it. "I think there's an organizational issue at the center of the problem this job would address," he continued.
I noticed he wasn't nervous. Usually Fred seems a little nervous to me, and this was sort of interesting.
"We have a good team here," he continued, "but we don't communicate enough. We're each in our own silo. I think I know everybody here very well. I think I have their respect."
He did. And he had put his finger on the reason we had created this new post. People working in silos seldom produce as much Excellence as those who pull together, or Quality even.
"I've been here for a long time," Fred said. "And I'm finding that thinking about even the possibility of getting this assignment has energized me in a whole new way." He stopped and looked at me with very big eyes, eyes gleaming with ambition and hope. And I saw the fire in his belly.
In cartoons a hungry wolf will look at a sheep in the meadow, and for a moment the cute, woolly creature itself will disappear and in its place will stand a juicy lamb chop. This is pretty much what happened when I looked at Fred. He himself vaporized, and in his place I saw a solution, and an end to interviewing.
"Okay, Fred," I said. "We have a couple more people to see, but I assure you that I'm going to think very seriously about what you've said."
"That's all?" said Fred, and I realized another thing: Thanks to his length of service, Fred and I knew each other well enough already to have attained a certain informality. "I have a lot more to tell you about if you want to hear it," he added, staring down at his file.
"No, Fred," I said. "I like what you've shown me today. Let me just think about things a little."
For about a week I thought. I told a couple of people what had happened. "For goodness' sake," they said, "give Fred a shot."
So you'll have to excuse me. This job I do is not always fun, but occasionally I get to do something that makes somebody happy. Sometimes the answer to your prayers is right under your nose."
Stanley Bing >> so appropriate for the current situation! Here's to going strong :-)
"This is a story of a guy named Fred who dared to see himself as something bigger. And because he did - because he was able to take that leap of faith - he made a good thing happen. Those who dare to imagine sometimes get what they want. Those who don't never do.
We had been interviewing people for a mid-level management job for, say, five months. If that seems odd to you, then you haven't run a department where every position represents the cumulative function of six that existed before. Choose the wrong person, and you enter a zone of dysfunction not all that different from having a debilitating disease. Ever have the flu but still have to go to the office? A bad hire is like that.
You see a lot of talented people when you're in this process, but within six seconds - not seven or eight- you know whether the person in front of you is going to be somebody with whom you can sustain a ten-minute conversation. The only thing I look for is whether the prospect of doing so makes me feel like falling asleep. I am not being metaphorical. Since I was a child, whenever I feel anxious and trapped, my eyelids get heavy. You can see how much I like the whole enterprise, then. And yet it must be done.
One day, deep in the darkest part of this tedium, Fred knocked at my door. Fred has worked for us for a long time, as long as I've been here, in fact. He's a good guy and a reliable, creative player. Never saw him as a manager, though. There are many like that, actually. Put them on a horse in the middle of the phalanx and they fight with gusto and brilliance. Put that horse at the front of the column and they lead the squad by a circuitous route into the swamp.
Fred stood in my doorway and said, "You found anybody for that manager slot yet?" And I thought, "Oh, no." I like Fred. I don't want to hurt Fred's feelings. "May I come in?" said Fred.
"Sure, Fred," I said.
"I've been thinking a lot about this job you're trying to fill, and I think I could be pretty good at it," said Fred. He had a file on his lap, and he opened it. "I think there's an organizational issue at the center of the problem this job would address," he continued.
I noticed he wasn't nervous. Usually Fred seems a little nervous to me, and this was sort of interesting.
"We have a good team here," he continued, "but we don't communicate enough. We're each in our own silo. I think I know everybody here very well. I think I have their respect."
He did. And he had put his finger on the reason we had created this new post. People working in silos seldom produce as much Excellence as those who pull together, or Quality even.
"I've been here for a long time," Fred said. "And I'm finding that thinking about even the possibility of getting this assignment has energized me in a whole new way." He stopped and looked at me with very big eyes, eyes gleaming with ambition and hope. And I saw the fire in his belly.
In cartoons a hungry wolf will look at a sheep in the meadow, and for a moment the cute, woolly creature itself will disappear and in its place will stand a juicy lamb chop. This is pretty much what happened when I looked at Fred. He himself vaporized, and in his place I saw a solution, and an end to interviewing.
"Okay, Fred," I said. "We have a couple more people to see, but I assure you that I'm going to think very seriously about what you've said."
"That's all?" said Fred, and I realized another thing: Thanks to his length of service, Fred and I knew each other well enough already to have attained a certain informality. "I have a lot more to tell you about if you want to hear it," he added, staring down at his file.
"No, Fred," I said. "I like what you've shown me today. Let me just think about things a little."
For about a week I thought. I told a couple of people what had happened. "For goodness' sake," they said, "give Fred a shot."
So you'll have to excuse me. This job I do is not always fun, but occasionally I get to do something that makes somebody happy. Sometimes the answer to your prayers is right under your nose."
Stanley Bing >> so appropriate for the current situation! Here's to going strong :-)
4.03.2008
One Year.
You know our love was meant to be
The kind of love that lasts forever
And I need you here with me
From tonight until the end of time
You should know, everywhere I go
You're always on my mind, in my heart
In my soul
You're the meaning in my life
You're the inspiration
You bring felling to my life
You're the inspiration
Wanna have you near me
I wanna have you hear me sayin'
No one needs you more that I need you
And i know, yes I know that it's plain to see
We're so in love when we're together
And i know that I need you here with me
From tonight until the end of time
You should know, everywhere I go
Always on my mind, in my heart in my soul
The future looks so good. Its good that Chicago was around to make awesome songs that describe that. Thanks Chicago. <3 <3 Chicago.
The kind of love that lasts forever
And I need you here with me
From tonight until the end of time
You should know, everywhere I go
You're always on my mind, in my heart
In my soul
You're the meaning in my life
You're the inspiration
You bring felling to my life
You're the inspiration
Wanna have you near me
I wanna have you hear me sayin'
No one needs you more that I need you
And i know, yes I know that it's plain to see
We're so in love when we're together
And i know that I need you here with me
From tonight until the end of time
You should know, everywhere I go
Always on my mind, in my heart in my soul
The future looks so good. Its good that Chicago was around to make awesome songs that describe that. Thanks Chicago. <3 <3 Chicago.
4.01.2008
Similar to a new beginning. Just in the middle of everything else.
So here it is. My first co-op. My thoughts? sjskjgysnghjksdfhdf. My reactions? djghsfjghuashjhdfjdf. Its definitely been a whirlwind the last couple of days. I had just gotten back from spring break (which is always too short), unpacked, and then headed for the 7:03 train to come out to Fort Washington. I went through the 'fun' orientation. Okay, it wasn't fun. But they did spare us from providing useless information, and hit us up with all the good things we ever needed to know. Then it was a tour of the space (cafeteria, store, FITNESS CENTER, executive offices.. you know the good stuff).
Finally I arrived at my desk, pleasantly surprised to find a computer, docking station, and HUGE screen for my poor old eyes to work off of. To say they least, they hooked me up. No wonder they are known for taking care of their employees (and I'm only a co-op!). I've made myself feel at home (including pictures of the Greek Isles- somewhere I WILL go to..) my flowers in a vase, a cute notepad my little sister gave me (it says 'behind every successful woman is herself'. It doesn't get better than that!). I brought in my post it notes (the cute ones), a cup for water so I can drink plenty during the day, and other stuff I most likely will never need. It's awesome.
So here's my embarassing moment of the day. I was forewarned that I was going to be meeting Eric, and here is what I learned about him (prior): He loves talking about hair, even though he is bald, and wants to take one of the other employees to get her haircut. When I met him, we had the hair discussion along with one of my other colleagues, then moved onto shoes, dancing with the stars, and king of prussia mall. Being my outgoing self, I was witty (of course), made a couple of jokes, puns etc... and giving him his run for his money. Here is what I learned about him after. He is the VP of Marketing for US McNeil Consumer Products. Really Abby? Well done. You should quit now.
Finally I arrived at my desk, pleasantly surprised to find a computer, docking station, and HUGE screen for my poor old eyes to work off of. To say they least, they hooked me up. No wonder they are known for taking care of their employees (and I'm only a co-op!). I've made myself feel at home (including pictures of the Greek Isles- somewhere I WILL go to..) my flowers in a vase, a cute notepad my little sister gave me (it says 'behind every successful woman is herself'. It doesn't get better than that!). I brought in my post it notes (the cute ones), a cup for water so I can drink plenty during the day, and other stuff I most likely will never need. It's awesome.
So here's my embarassing moment of the day. I was forewarned that I was going to be meeting Eric, and here is what I learned about him (prior): He loves talking about hair, even though he is bald, and wants to take one of the other employees to get her haircut. When I met him, we had the hair discussion along with one of my other colleagues, then moved onto shoes, dancing with the stars, and king of prussia mall. Being my outgoing self, I was witty (of course), made a couple of jokes, puns etc... and giving him his run for his money. Here is what I learned about him after. He is the VP of Marketing for US McNeil Consumer Products. Really Abby? Well done. You should quit now.
3.24.2008
icelandic and breathtaking
Not the usual post name- but it is the name of the colors I am using to repaint the upstairs bathroom. My stay here is Rochester is extremely limited, just around 7 days to be exact. So I was faced with the dilemma of sitting at home every day (which is FUN!) or putting my 7 days of unscheduled and restless days to good work. School work? Nooooooooooo. Personal work? ha. I've put myself hard at work making our shameful girls bathroom (which is currently coated in blue tile...) to good use and practice my interior designing skills. The look has yet to be completed. I'll post something up here just so everyone can see how good I am (yea, right!) and be compelled to make the same change.
So there pops up my question- and my favorite word. Change. Who fears it, and why? We all recognize the fact that there are reasons behind it (security, comfort, lack of confidence in the unknown) but does it deal with resources too? If we have everything we need to complete the task (I have sand paper, rollers, primer, the whole deal) are we more confident? Or if it is something we really want to be completed, do we find the resources anyways? The answer may seem obvious (umm, yes?) but if you really look into it, I think the size of the task at hand, the resources available and those working around you (or lack there of in my case) really mold your opinion of change. But then there are those who simply fear it. What would be the ideal situation for change? Think learning, results, failures, frustrations, triumphs..
So there pops up my question- and my favorite word. Change. Who fears it, and why? We all recognize the fact that there are reasons behind it (security, comfort, lack of confidence in the unknown) but does it deal with resources too? If we have everything we need to complete the task (I have sand paper, rollers, primer, the whole deal) are we more confident? Or if it is something we really want to be completed, do we find the resources anyways? The answer may seem obvious (umm, yes?) but if you really look into it, I think the size of the task at hand, the resources available and those working around you (or lack there of in my case) really mold your opinion of change. But then there are those who simply fear it. What would be the ideal situation for change? Think learning, results, failures, frustrations, triumphs..
3.23.2008
take two
My question is simple. What ever happened to the thought of being a self-sufficient independent person? I suppose its more posed towards the female gender, but I'm sure it applies to both species. There seems to be a need more than ever to be connected to someone, to live with someone- practically anything but independent.
Granted I'm all about relationships (and in one) but the thought of living with someone (sorry, Dan) scares the crap out of me! It's like going back to living with the parents, with a few bonuses. You have the sharing of space, mutual cleaning/responsibilities, someone hounding you for not doing your part, sharing groceries, bills, purchases... I mean it's endless!! You head out with your girlfriends, and you let your boy know when you are going to be home. What happens when you are late? It's like you went past your curfew, and he's mad, but mostly because you made him worry (hello high school!)
How can you experience everything you need to when there is someone else to worry about? Is it better to experience every single thing with them before you are even married? What does that voice inside ones head say when its time to move in with someone? Do you just try it out, then find it doesn't work out so hot, and lose your safety deposit, plus head out to find somewhere else to live? When do you approach those really awkward conversations like his personal hygienic habits or your hour and a half or grooming in the morning? Is it really worth it? I'm all about personal happiness, and hell if these are the means to the end, by golly you best be moving!! But what do you miss out on? Is there a right time? A wrong time? A good age? A bad age? A good reason? A bad reason? As I promised- full of questions.
Disclaimer: This post was not directed to any certain individual(s) so please do not flatter yourself and think I wrote about you. That's just silly.
Granted I'm all about relationships (and in one) but the thought of living with someone (sorry, Dan) scares the crap out of me! It's like going back to living with the parents, with a few bonuses. You have the sharing of space, mutual cleaning/responsibilities, someone hounding you for not doing your part, sharing groceries, bills, purchases... I mean it's endless!! You head out with your girlfriends, and you let your boy know when you are going to be home. What happens when you are late? It's like you went past your curfew, and he's mad, but mostly because you made him worry (hello high school!)
How can you experience everything you need to when there is someone else to worry about? Is it better to experience every single thing with them before you are even married? What does that voice inside ones head say when its time to move in with someone? Do you just try it out, then find it doesn't work out so hot, and lose your safety deposit, plus head out to find somewhere else to live? When do you approach those really awkward conversations like his personal hygienic habits or your hour and a half or grooming in the morning? Is it really worth it? I'm all about personal happiness, and hell if these are the means to the end, by golly you best be moving!! But what do you miss out on? Is there a right time? A wrong time? A good age? A bad age? A good reason? A bad reason? As I promised- full of questions.
Disclaimer: This post was not directed to any certain individual(s) so please do not flatter yourself and think I wrote about you. That's just silly.
3.20.2008
Wait. Who?
I was getting lunch with one of my co-RA's today when he asked me question that threw me for a loop: If someone gets the job you wanted, and you and I both know they don't deserve it, how would you feel? My first reaction was livid. I am currently awaiting the arrival of my placement for next year as an RA as well as my potential to become a Head RA, and the thought of someone who didn't fill the position taking mine shook me up to say the least. Then I thought about it. How does this apply outside of Drexel University? What if this were to happen to me in the corporate world? So here came my answer. I said it was their loss, right? If I didn't fit what they were looking for, if they didn't see the potential I know I have to exceed beyond expectations, then there is a good chance I don't even want the position in the first place. But at the same time, I'd be question what wasn't quiet good enough for them, what the one person had that I didn't, and it would work its way back to confidence issues everyone has. So how do you really handle that situation? Is it better to think that they are the ones in the wrong, or turn around and look back into yourself to see how you can improve? Or is it both? Maybe you hope that they didn't quiet know you well enough, that your hair looked bad that day, and they didn't understand the awesome experiences you were telling them about. Maybe they just didn't want to listen to what you had to say, and maybe that is their loss.
3.19.2008
The first one
I've never been a blogger. I don't really like it that much. But this is where I'll be posting many of my life "epiphanies", that is assuming that I'll be having many in my life time. I apologize in advanced if I can't keep it up, but I'm going to be optimistic and think that I can keep things in track. I'm a person of question- one of my favorite things to do is listen to things that people "tell" me, what I should and shouldn't do, and then figure out what puts them in the position to tell me these things. Many people are wise beyond any natural ability, other people should probably stay quiet. But none the less I will always listen, ponder, and take it into consideration. It can't hurt, can it? The blog title comes from the expectations people have of me, of themselves, of life in general. You are supposed to do this blah blah blah... so they say. Here's to a blog of questions and very few answers.
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